Embracing life’s paradox :

Yesterday , I had what seemed like a near-death experience.

Yesterday, I had what seemed like a near-death experience in my mind. It was actually a pretty bad bike accident. But what bothers me is that I'm alright, while the person who crashed into me isn't. It's strange how life can be perfectly fine as you ride to the gym on an ordinary morning, and then everything changes in a split second. I'm incredibly grateful that both the person who crashed into me and I are okay, but he was severely injured and taken to the hospital.

What's been weighing on me is the fact that if it weren't for him, I might have died. He absorbed most of the impact—I fell into him, and he hit the ground. For a solid 30 seconds, I believed he was dead. I thought I had taken someone's life. I can't even begin to grasp or fully understand that feeling. All I know is that today I woke up with my eyes wide open to life. It's funny how we go through each day, following our daily routines: going to the gym, working, eating, engaging with loved ones, and sleeping. Most of us do this repeatedly without pausing to appreciate the little, significant moments where we can truly experience life itself.

It's an interesting paradox: in life, we strive for more, aiming to be at the top and, unconsciously, trying to evade death. But what we fail to realize is that each day brings us closer to it. Sometimes, we even put ourselves in situations where our lives can be cut short.  

What's worse is when we are immersed in incredible experiences, yet we forget to savor them because we are already living for what comes next. This brings me to the main point of this reflection: why do we forget to live in the present moment? To appreciate the beautiful gift that life inherently is. After yesterday, I want to start appreciating life a bit more every single day. Of course, I won't go crazy and abruptly abandon everything to wander off to Asia. However, I intend to relish the small moments a little more. And since this has always been an open space, I would love to share my thoughts.

Here's how I see it: we should stop worrying about what we can't have, what life can't provide, and start cherishing what it does give us, no matter how insignificant it may seem. Need an example? Over the past six months, I've been going through an incredibly tough phase that triggered a mild depression. I couldn't understand why I felt so dissatisfied and sad, even though I had my dream job, amazing friends, incredible travel opportunities, and a beloved dog—a life that someone would view as happiness. I constantly questioned the meaning behind it all. Lately, I've been coping with it better, but yesterday served as a profound wake-up call on various levels.

So here it is.

 Firstly: play it like a kid. Enjoy it more and be grateful for those little moments I often overlook a hearty laughter session with friends, waking up in the morning and savoring the gentle morning sun on my face as it seeps through the window, the invigorating feeling after a good workout, the electrifying sensation coursing through my body during an orgasm. Why am I not more grateful and present during these moments? That's what life is truly about—not toiling away like a fool until I have enough money to flaunt, relentlessly striving for a body comparable to supermodels, or engaging in empty encounters solely to seek momentary pleasure without truly appreciating the person in front of me. The secret to enjoying life lies in the unnoticed details that, once experienced, are fulfilling, special, and electric.

Secondly, don’t be a zombie. Be honest with yourself about your feelings and accept them. If you realize that you could be enjoying life a bit more, then pause, reflect, and engage in a fun conversation with yourself. There's no definitive way to know what a well-lived life looks like, but if you remain present and grateful, I'm confident that you'll look back and feel proud of yourself.

Thirdly: love. This one is pretty self-explanatory.

To sum up, I genuinely hope that you don't have to endure a terrifying near-death experience to finally open your eyes and perceive the world around you. To realize that it has been right there all along, but you chose not to pay attention to it. I sincerely hope that, gradually yet steadily, you discover the surprises and precious gifts life has to offer if you simply pause for a moment, observe, and appreciate them. If only I had done this yesterday, appreciating the warm sun on my face when I woke up, I might have been ten seconds late to the accident that deeply impacted someone else's life and well-being. However, at the same time, I'm glad it happened, and I recognize the paradox in that. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way. Sure, I was extremely scared, and I genuinely thought I had taken someone's life. Yet, being so close to death has stirred something indescribable within me, and I hope I can continue to share and inspire, to be here for you and have discussions about it.

With all the sparkle, love, and joy that my life has to offer,

Lo