I Uploaded a Picture in a Bra, and this is what Happened
My response to your reaction
In a very bold move,
I decided to upload a picture in my underwear that made me feel sexy, confident, and beautiful to my photography Instagram page. I wanted to share this with the world and share how confident and sexy I felt, share my empowerment, and share my privacy. After all, I’ve been fighting for body positivity for a while. Sharing a picture online of me in underwear made me feel a sort of empowerment and appreciation towards myself that I’ve never felt before.
However, it was not well received. Coming from a very close-minded, macho, and conservative society, this should not come as a surprise. But it did, and it hurt, particularly because the strongest critics and “concerns” came from my close circle, the people that have been with me on this path towards body acceptance, positivity, and love. The ones that have witnessed me bloom into a confident, sexy woman.
Many asked me what was wrong with me? Was I drunk? Did I do it to get someone’s attention? What was I trying to prove? But the comment that I received the most was “protect your privacy” these words made me think a lot; they made me uncomfortable. I understood them but disagreed with them. By protecting your privacy, they mean don’t let random people look at your body, at your sexy black lace bra. But why not? What is so wrong with me wanting to share my body? My sexiness? All the body struggle aside; why can’t a girl be seen in underwear? “Lorenza, your sisters, and your friends would never post this on their feed,” a friend told me. And although the comment comes out of worry and love, it made me think. I respect the fact that they do not feel comfortable posting such pictures, but why shouldn’t they respect the fact that I do? Why are friends wondering how “provocative” it is instead of looking at it as a depiction of my own sexual empowerment through my semi-naked body, a “you can share your body, don’t be afraid to be judged.” But it isn't easy; after all, conservatism in Mexican society is deep-rooted, even if we think we have evolved out of it.
I understand that if I put myself out there by sharing my body, I have to be ready for positive or negative responses. But what bothers me is the blindness and quickness of how people judge or give their opinion without asking for the backstory or trying to see what’s in the other persons’ mind.
I’m 9000 km away from all these opinions, and I still let them affect me. But in a way, they are helpful because I’m getting the conversation going. Some people might not understand me or agree with me, but I think it is important to stop judging, especially women. Especially in the times, we are living. And yes, as a social media presence, no matter the impact, you should always be careful and respectful, but as a follower, you decide what content to engage with. So be respectful if you can, it is nice.
Slut-shaming has all kinds of forms and ways of hurting people; for me, this was it. I share these thoughts, not in spite, anger, or sadness; I do it because I know many people out there have felt the same way as I do today, not only women. I invite you to start appreciating more diversity online, more bodies, sexiness, and more stories. Let’s stop judging and start talking and engage in conversation. I ask you to talk and reflect before making up your mind; you never know how a baseless judgment might affect someone, especially if they have a newfound confidence.
Love for everyone who reads this, but especially for myself.
L