today I’m ready

As I fly back home,

I realize that it's the first time in a while that I go back with so much peace and happiness.

Lately, I've been very present; I've enjoyed life a lot and the little moments it has to offer. I've opened myself up to everything: friends, people, jobs, opportunities, lovers, and every experience I was afraid of before. 

I wouldn't be in this happy place if I didn't break down my insecurity and beliefs barrier.

Since I acknowledged these fears and how they stopped me from truly enjoying life, I've realized that I've felt more myself than ever, more alive, more Lorenza.

It is fantastic to feel what I am capable of if I live in the moment.

What does this mean to me?

Well, I have started to enjoy, be honest, be less anxious, bring down walls, and change the deep-rooted beliefs that affected me so terribly.

Six months ago, I thought about myself a lot, but in a toxic way. I constantly felt sorry for myself, sad and anxious.

The last time I took this plane back home was three months ago, and I was in a dark place. I was confused and sick; I lost my self-confidence and was heartbroken. I cried a bit but still had faith. I knew that I had to follow a path, but I was not sure how. Or where it led. 

If you had told Lorenza how I feel today, she would've never believed you.

Well, she should because, today, three months later, on the same flight back home, it is fascinating how much this Lorenza has grown. She has opened her eyes. Today, Lorenza keeps evolving, learning, and loves to be with herself. She does not compare herself with others and most importantly, sees and loves herself.

Today, Lorenza is present; she wants to discover herself confront her fears and beliefs. Today she has confidence.

I have become a Lorenza that sits on a plane and talks to a stranger without feeling judged. A Lorenza that makes friends in a park without thinking of her insecurities. A Lorenza wakes every day at 6 am to go boxing; that same boxing made me so insecure about failing, and today is congratulated on her progress. Today, I am a Lorenza who gives thanks every morning, meditates, loves herself and her life.

Today I am a Lorenza who no longer seeks validation from people and has learned to love her solitude.

Today I care less what others think about me and how they see me. Instead, I care about how I can positively impact other people's lives.

I know that I still have a long way to go, but what's most incredible is that I've lost the fear of time, of patience. 

I now know that opportunities will come when needed, and their time will be precious in my life.

I don't know if this has happened to you, but I used to worry a lot about the future, sometimes I still do. But I've learned that it is essential to be patient and discover this new me because she keeps surprising me. Do you know why? Because the most incredible lesson was learning to say to myself: "I'm not that kind of person anymore, and with that part that is leaving, that is empty, I have a thousand opportunities to become someone new."

So the first thing that comes into my mind when I think of this new me is my smile. That "Lo" smile, the "Flor Mariposa Brillante" smile, lets me know that everything will be all right. A smile of comfort and peace. That is the person I want to be.

A conscious person that is present, hardworking, a fighter, and a lover of life. A person that can see the good side in all the bad situations and a lesson out of every day.

But why wait? Today I am that Lorenza. 

A Lorenza who enjoys life and her work doesn't worry about the future, enjoys every minute of life, a chill, loving Lorenza.

Today, I am a Lo that is your ally, that listens to you and gives you a space to change and grow; if and when you are ready.

Today I thank you because you have been a part of this journey, and it is a journey that I will keep sharing, no matter what.

Today I am a Lorenza that is ready for everything.

Today I invite you to start your path or keep going. 

Trust me, the light is always brighter on the other side, even if the path is tricky.

Just stay true to yourself.

With all my love,

The new L